You can brake me within a second
by You'd be pretty in any colour
Summary: Katniss is pregnant with her first child, but receives a worried call from her doctor.                                       Her child is killing her, but will she go along with it?
1. Prequel Patience kills

Katniss and Peeta sat in the doctor's waiting surgery, obversing the room. Katniss felt a slight chill go through her body, as Peeta held tightly onto her hand. They had received an urgent phone call, saying they had found problems with the baby on Katniss' last scan and needed to check up on her. Katniss felt her stomach, and sought for that slight kick of the baby, which sent butterflies through her stomach. She couldn't find it. She dropped her head in Peeta's lap, then heard the voice she had been dreading. "Katniss Everdeen, please come in." She gulped, holding tightly onto Peeta's hand as she walked into the surgery.


	2. Killing me from the inside

"I'm sorry, but we have some bad news." The doctor said, seemingly generally concerned. Katniss clasped Peeta's hand, as tightly as she could. She prepared herself for the worse, almost creating an imaginery sheild around herself so whatever the doctor said would bounce off, and not effect her. But the next words that came out of the doctor's mouth even Katniss couldn't pretend not to care.

"On the last scan, we found out that your body is not strong enough to withstand your baby. If you go through with the pregnancy, there is a 50% you and the baby could both die." Peeta, in shock, let go of Katniss' hand, as he watched his wife fall to pieces. _No. I can't lose her._ Was the first thought that came into Peeta's mind as he looked at his distraught wife, whom was hugging tightly onto her stomach, speechless. The silence in that room, at that moment, was deafening. Peeta tried to hug his wife, but she fought him off, still holding onto stomach. It was then he decided to take matters into his own hands, after finally finding his voice, he told the doctor what he knew Katniss wouldn't like to hear.

"Doctor, I, for one, will do anything to keep my Katniss alive. Can she get rid of the baby, at this late stage?" Peeta slightly whispered the last sentence, because, in all honesty, he was scared of his wife. He didn't want to get rid of his child, but they had no choice. Katniss shook her head, finally letting go of her stomach. She gulped, forcing the words out. "No." She said, shaking her head more ferociously this time. Peeta tried to grab her hand, but she pulled away, not taking one glance at Peeta.

"Listen to me, we are not getting rid of this child. If we die, so be it, but we've got a 50% chance of living and I'm going with it. Think about it Peeta. I've escaped death so many times, and maybe this is the time I actually die." Katniss rushed through the last sentence, worried what Peeta would think. She had the upper hand in this, as the baby was inside her, but Peeta had his powers of persuasion. Peeta wanted to speak out, but he took one look at Katniss and knew that wasn't an option. He sighed, and looked at Katniss' stomach. _What if I punch it? _He thought, imagining the baby inside Katniss' stomach. He couldn't. That baby was his, and if he killed it, he'd be living with it for the rest of his life. He smiled at Katniss, but inside, he was breaking. Peeta tried to think positive, pretending that there was some hope. But it was so hard, pretending he was fine with that _thing _killing Katniss.


	3. You're just innocent

Peeta and Katniss walked out of the surgery hand in hand, looking like a couple who'd just simply had a baby scan, with a baby that wasn't killing its mother. Katniss seemed deep in thought, continuously looking behind her. Peeta spun her round, in an attempt to make her stop looking behind. Instead, she laughed, planting a huge kiss on Peeta's check. Peeta held her close for a second, their hearts beating together as one. The moment was broken up when Peeta almost tried to attack Katniss. Again. He gave a slight smile to Katniss, an apologetic look on his face.

"Sorry." He said. Peeta wanted to punch himself. It was bad enough with her own daughter or son harming her, but now him? He'd just have to learn to control himself. He shook it off, kissing Katniss' forehead. In that moment, when Peeta was holding her close, the moment was perfect. In that moment, he forgot about the baby and the fact Katniss could die. It was just two people in love, and nothing else mattered. He liked it like that. Whenever he touched Katniss, he felt that way. Just kissing her sent chills down his body. He looked down at her stomach, wanting to love the baby in there so much but thinking he could never love it. Not if it killed Katniss. Katniss caught him looking at her bump, putting a protective hand over it.

"It's just a baby, Peeta. Do you really think that if it had the choice, it would be killing its mother? I swear, whenever I feel a little kick from this baby I get butterflies. I can feel love, too. I'm speaking so corny and so cliché but…" Katniss lowered her head so she was looking down at her stomach. "I love you, darling. No matter what daddy says I will not get rid of you. I know you can't say it, but I know you love me too." She lifted her head up, wiping a tear. Without any warning, she suddenly burst into tears. We were minutes away from home, but Peeta pulled her to the side on a bench near the sea.

"Katniss don't cry. C'mon, don't do this." Peeta said, trying to comfort Katniss as he wiped her tears with his fingers. Katniss continued to cry, but inside she was screaming. Peeta could tell. He had seen this many times in the arena. She couldn't scream, so she'd scream inside of her head, whilst tears were falling outside of her body because of the pressure not to scream. Peeta cradled her, her head on his lap, as he stroked her hair.

"We've been through so much already. We can do this." Peeta said. Katniss sat up, surprised he had taken to this so quickly. She gave him a month tops, but not this short. If he had hope, then so did she. It was the first positive thing Peeta had said about the baby. Peeta stroked the bump, expecting to still hate it. He'd pretend he was fine for Katniss, because she didn't need him moaning, but inside he'd want the baby gone. But as he touched the baby, he felt a tiny flutter. A small flutter of love. In that instant, he realized what was inside Katniss was just an innocent baby. He held onto her stomach, stroking Katniss' stomach over and over again.

"I reckon it's a girl." Katniss said, smiling at Peeta. Eventually, he was realizing that killing the baby was just a child, as innocent as the babies you saw in strollers often, who gurgled away. Giggly, happy babies. That was what Katniss predicted for her child, not a future where neither of them weren't alive. "We will be the best dam victor tributes Panem has ever seen." She turned to Peeta, hugging him tightly. A proper family. She didn't want to face the nightmare that she knew she was going to have tonight.


	4. Mistaking love for fear

**Authors Note: Thanks for the positive comments and everything! This chapter is a bit longer. I'm not very good at writing long chapters as on word it always looks longer to me than it turns out. This chapter is more Joniss (Johanna+Katniss) so sorry to all Peeniss shippers, they'll be back next chapter. Enjoy!**

I woke up screaming more than once that night. And every time, Peeta held me until I fell asleep again. The nightmare that I kept having was of Prim and Rue, welcoming me and the baby into Heaven. It was a slightly comforting dream, for a while, but then the baby turned on me. Prim and Rue tried to protect me, but after a while they turned on me too. They tried to kill me, a demonic look in their eyes. I didn't get much sleep. All I could think about is the look on the child's face. A look that meant death.

Throughout the entire day, the dream haunted her. Nothing Peeta could say or do would comfort her. She hugged her stomach, trying to convince herself that this baby didn't mean for any of this to happen. She sat in her bedroom, crying. Her eyes become red and puffy. _Look at you, you're pathetic, _a voice in her head whispered. _You've gone through almost dying, but this is your child. Get your act together. _The voice sounded like Johanna. She hadn't seen Johanna in a while, so she wondered why she was dominating her thoughts. She hugged her knees to her chest, and turned to face the door, where she saw Johanna.

She hadn't seen Johanna in a few months, and in those few months she hadn't changed much. Her normally brown hair had been dyed red, but that was about it. The red suited her and her fiery personality. She smiled, leaning against the door frame. She was also rather skinnier. Johanna walked over to Katniss' bed and sat on the edge, without invitation.

"Hello, brainless. I heard you've got a baby inside you." Johanna smiled, her usual kidding self. Johanna was sometimes serious, but when she was serious you had to listen to her. _I'm not like the rest of you. There's no one left I love. _Johanna had said that in a deadly serious tone, when they were in the quarter quell. Katniss had felt like that, when Prim died. But she had Peeta. She had heard rumours of Johanna and Gale, but she wasn't one to believe rumours. She'd heard many spread about herself. Johanna didn't wait for Katniss to reply before getting to the serious things.

"I don't know if you've heard, but I can't have children. Whatever the Capitol did to me led to me being infertile. So, _appreciate this child._ I want a baby more than anything, but yet I can't have one. I don't care if this child is killing you, it's a baby and it's not trying to. Katniss, it's your child and it loves you. And I know you love it too, no matter how many times you cry about it, you _will not _get rid of this child." Katniss looked up to face Johanna. She hadn't heard Johanna was unable to have children. Katniss had always thought of Johanna as never having children, she couldn't love somebody like that. Or could she? Her tone of voice telling Katniss that she loved the child was something she had never heard before. The sharp, quick tone that Katniss wouldn't mess with no matter what. Did the baby really love her? She felt a slight feeling go up inside her, and she knew that the baby was saying yes. _Do not worry my darling, I will never hurt you. I love you._

"I didn't know you couldn't have children." Katniss said, surprising herself. The tone she used was a tone of someone who didn't care. She stared down at her stomach. This new feeling overcame her, a feeling that the only person who mattered was this child inside of her. That new matter what, she would protect this child. Johanna shrugged, crawling over closer to Katniss. She stroked Katniss' stomach, becoming lost for a second. Katniss bowed her head to look at Johanna, who seemed to be crying. Katniss had never seen Johanna cry, so this was an odd sight. As she saw Katniss looking, she quickly wiped her tears and tore herself away from Katniss' stomach.

"I'd give anything to have this child in my stomach. Then my life would be complete. I wouldn't even care if it was killing me." Johanna didn't seem to be saying this to Katniss; she seemed to be saying it to the baby. She continued to look at Katniss' stomach, and Katniss knew that Johanna wanted to hate her. She had the only thing Johanna wanted, and she wasn't appreciating it. Katniss decided to ask Johanna if she was dating Gale. She hadn't seen Gale in a few years. The last time he visited, it had reminded Katniss of everything that happened in the past and she couldn't face it.

"Johanna, don't hate me. But I've heard these… rumours about you and Gale, and…" Katniss was slightly scared that Johanna would start screaming. She was being careful, because she may not be completely cured from the Capitol's ways. Johanna just simply laughed. "Oh, Katniss. Still afraid of me, are you?" She laughed again, making Katniss feel rather uncomfortable. Katniss backed away, causing Johanna to stop laughing.

"Yes, they're true." Johanna slightly smiled then. Katniss was happy for her and Gale. She had never really imagined it, as the first time they had met Gale had told Katniss he was scared of her. Odd how we predicted fear for love, Katniss thought. In that moment, she thought of Peeta when they had found out. He was afraid, but he had always loved this child. No matter what. She turned to Johanna, a giant smile on her face, the biggest she had worn in a long time.

"Johanna, this baby is going to have the best parents in the whole goddamn, cruel, messed up world." She made this promise to herself. If they made it out alive, her child would be loved like no other, she would make sure of that.


	5. I'll love you through it all

**Author's Note: Sorry I haven't updated in a while, I've been away without internet and been quite busy. I hope you enjoy this chapter, and happy holidays!**

"Whilst we highly disapprove of you putting yourself and your child through danger by going through with this pregnancy, we have to respect your decision. Now, before I show you your baby, is there any way I can change your minds?" Katniss sighed. Why did they have to say they respected her decision, then try their complete and utter best to make her change it into something they felt right? The doctor probably thought she was mad, bringing a child into the world that could kill her when she had narrowly escaped death many times before. She shook her head as a reply to the doctor, quickly turning to Peeta, signalling him to do the same.

The doctor placed a black and white sonogram in front of them, almost seeming careful not to touch it, as if even looking at a picture of her baby could land him a place in Hell. To say this made Katniss mad was an understatement. Peeta tried to grab her hand as she rose from her seat, knowing she wasn't happy. He looked up at her, his eyes begging her to leave it. _Katniss, please don't. These people have seen us fight for Panem time and time again, is it wrong for them to not want us killed? _His eyes said all this, and Katniss knew it. She sat back down in her seat, shooting Peeta a slight comedic glance. She couldn't resist his gorgeous, blue eyes. They were sort of like droplets of water. How many times she had wished she could just sink into them, forgetting the real world…

"Is there anything else, or can we leave?" Peeta asked, sensing Katniss didn't feel like staying in the company of this doctor. Katniss looked at the picture of her baby, and immediately sobbed into tears. This beautiful baby is mine, was all she could think. With mine and Peeta's love, we have made this beautiful baby. She couldn't get that thought out of her head. Whilst this baby didn't look like much yet, to her it was perfect. She stuck it under Peeta's chin, a gigantic smile covering her face. She wiped her tears with her sleeve, keeping the image of her baby alive in her head.

Peeta looked at the picture of the baby, smiling. He couldn't deny that when he looked at this baby he felt a rush of love, and wanted to hold it more than he could explain. His feelings went all over the place. He'd never felt this way, except from when he first saw Katniss, or whenever he touched Katniss. It was sort of like magic. But with the baby, it was warmer. It gave him this feeling like there was a fire inside of him, making his body love more than he thought capable. He grinned at Katniss, handing her the picture.

"Okay, thanks for the picture." Katniss faked a smile to the doctor, and held Peeta's hand as she stood up, not wanting to let him go. The baby was a symbol of their love, and it made Katniss feel like half their relationship hadn't been fake. She held tightly onto Peeta's hand, holding in her other hand the picture, being careful not to tear it or anything. Katniss had almost forgotten that there was only a half chance her and this baby would make it out alive, and in that moment she remembered the couple scene her and Peeta had been sharing was ruined. Whenever she felt happy, that thought came up and destroyed it all.

"Why does it have to be like this?" She asked Peeta, a sad look in her eyes. Peeta found it hard not to laugh, she looked like a mouse with her big grey eyes looking at him. He put his arm around her shoulder, wishing he knew what to say. He just kicked at the ground, refusing to look at Katniss. Hell, if he knew why life had to be such a bitch sometimes, then maybe he'd figure out the whole theory of destiny. The only thing he was scared of was that it was Katniss' destiny to die with her child.

"It's okay. You don't have to say anything." Katniss placed his hand over her stomach, making him feel the movements their child was making. That could say more than words could. He tugged at her hand, running slightly ahead of her. She laughed slightly, and ran after him. The sun beamed down on them, making their foreheads slightly sweaty. Katniss ran after Peeta, her hand still entwined in his. Katniss had dreamed of running away with Gale, many moons ago. Now it seemed like an ancient fairytale, Gale telling her they could make it. She shook her head of the thought of Gale. Since he had been with Johanna, he probably hadn't given her a single thought. She made sure her mind was back with her true love, Peeta. But the thought of what Gale would do in Peeta's situation still loomed in her mind, like a shadow.

"Here we are." Peeta smiled, letting go of her hand and moving out of her view of the place he had taken her to. She gasped, taking in the scenery. She had never really cared about scenery, to her it was just landscape, but she could appreciate beauty in its finest form. They were near a waterfall, that had crystal blue water. They stood upon a hill, with a few trees around them. The waterfall didn't go many feet down, and led to a beautiful stream of water, that seemed lapped in beauty. Peeta grinned, looking at Katniss.

"It's beautiful." She gasped again, not really realizing that she was really here with Peeta. Years ago, she would have never even dreamed of this. Not with Peeta. It was a slight out of body experience, like she was watching from the shadows this confident girl with a guy who had saved her life so many times. He grabbed her hand again, holding it tighter than before. He walked her round to the waterfall. It looked much more graceful and beautiful when she was staring at it this way.

"Get on my back." Peeta said, seeming to know the scenery off by heart. He must have been coming here rather often, Katniss thought. It was more beautiful than any place she had ever seen before. She got on Peeta's back, holding her arms around his neck. She thought this had been to give her a higher view, so she got a shock when she found herself in the air, inches away from the water. It was a jolt of excitement, and she loved it. When they landed in the water, she swam around in it like a fish, wanting to savour every moment.

"Sorry for shocking you like that, but I figured I'd give you a bit of an adrenaline rush." Peeta rather nervously shrugged, but still wore the same grin. Katniss elbowed him slightly, giggling. It sort of felt like the honeymoon her and Peeta had never had. It made her feel as if they were the only two people in the world. Katniss wanted to do something unexpected to Peeta, but she wanted to make him feel a hell of a lot more than adrenaline. She swam closer to him, planting her lips on his, only kissing him softly at first. The touch grew more hungry, and Peeta started replying to her kisses. She kissed him slightly softly, he kissed her a little more harder, she kissed him harder, he kissed her a little more hander, it went on like this for about half a minute, until Katniss wanted more.

Katniss had never been one to throw herself at anyone, not even Peeta. So she kept kissing him, until both their bodies were almost on fire. Katniss kissed Peeta's neck, but only softly, teasing him. She could feel his body wanting more than a few soft kisses on the neck, but still she only kissed his neck softly, almost blowing raspberries on his neck as she laughing because of it. Finally she answered his prayers, and started kissing his neck harder, coming to his shirt. She tilted her head up. She hadn't realized either of them were still dressed and that they'd have to go back in soaked to the bone clothes, so she thought she'd see if they could dry.

"Peeta, I'm not going to do all that stuff for you and I don't want to walk home in wet clothes, so get undressed." Katniss smiled. It was true, she didn't like taking off Peeta's clothes for him, no matter how burning hot their bodies got. She chucked off her top, flinging it to the side of the water. She then sort of watched Peeta take his off, and by sort of I mean she watched without taking her eye of him but also taking off her shorts. As soon as Peeta saw her looking, Katniss quickly turned her head, kicking off her shorts under the water. She chucked them over the side, and swam over to Peeta's side. He looked at her lovingly, but with a slightly lustful look too. She waggled her finger when she found him staring at her bra.

"I take off my own clothes; you take off your own, okay?" She smiled. The first time her and Peeta had sex, he made sure that it was exactly how she wanted it. It was quite cute, there were candles and rose petals everywhere. She slipped off her bra and knickers quickly. It was weird, she had gotten so used to seeing people naked she couldn't really care less if anyone saw her. About half the people she knew had seen her naked. Rather than her out of body experience, she now felt as if she was living it, but that she was in a scene in a film. It was so cliché it was funny.

As her and Peeta's body collided together, she forgot everything. The baby that was killing her from the inside seemed like a story she had read, a story that she didn't care about. It was only Peeta's touch she longed for, only Peeta's touch she cared for in that moment. The water flowed with them as their bodies moved, truly acting like a flow of love. "I love you, you know that? I love you so much." She said, her body moving closer to his face. His eyes met hers, and Katniss knew what he was saying, without him even needing to say it. _I love you too._


	6. The odds are not in our favour

**Authors Note: I'm sorry it hasn't been updated for a while, and as an attempt to make up for it chapter 7 will be up tomorrow, as long as I can make it. Thank you so much to everyone for adding this to your story alerts, I really appreciate it. Enjoy this chapter.**

"I don't understand you sometimes, Peeta." Katniss said, not focusing on him. She was more focused on the job in hand. She had been told if she had become healthier, her baby would have a better chance of survival. Katniss herself thought it was some stupid rumour spread, but she was willing to try anything to keep her child alive. And here was Peeta, behaving like a petty child. Katniss with time had grown sick of it, but it was something she was useful. It was strange, with Peeta she couldn't feel like a brat when she got annoyed. In the seam, she had constantly felt selfish and rude. Compared to Peeta it almost felt like nothing.

"I don't see the point in doing this. The odds are going to stay exactly the same." Katniss grins, remembering how the word "odds" haunted her throughout her life. The odds have never been in Katniss' favour. Not today, not yesterday and most definitely not in the future. Katniss, by now, has learned to live with it. Peeta and Katniss seem to both have the same thought, and they silently grin at each other. _The odds are stacked against us, but who needs them? _Katniss thought. It showed in her expression, and Peeta mouthed back _Not us. Never have, never will. _They smile, a smile that holds so much. The people in this gym don't have a clue what they have gone through. Katniss almost envies them, here in this gym for no reason besides to lose weight, and here she is fighting for her and her child's life. She'd give anything to have their lives. Petty humans, some whom the hunger games is only a subject taught in history to them. It makes Katniss sick to her stomach.

"I need some air." She says, walking out. Peeta follows, much like a lost puppy. But they're both lost. They always have been. Two lost souls who found each other. Bruised and battered, emotionally and physically, by the Capitol. Katniss still often wakes up to nightmares, always with Peeta's strong arms to hold her tight and comfort her. At least Gale now had someone to comfort him. With everything he had experienced, even though he would never admit it, Katniss knew he had nightmares. Rue and Prim both dominated Katniss' nightmares. Rue, the little girl in the arena with feet like wings. Sometimes Katniss wondered what it would have been like if she had won, instead of Peeta and herself. There would have been no rebellion, but what if little Rue may have had a trick up her sleeve? She despised the Capitol just as much as Katniss did, so what would little Rue have done?

Katniss wakes up from her daydream to find Peeta's arms wrapped around her neck, whispering softly in her ear. "Katniss, what's the matter?" Not exactly that romantic, but it will do. She sits on the wall outside the gym, patting the space next to her for Peeta to come join her. _But what if he doesn't understand? _A little voice creeps up out of her mind. _What if he just thinks you're a pathetic, jealous cow? _Katniss pushes it aside; the other part of her mind assuring her this is false. Peeta would never compare her to a cow, and he must understand. Surely? Still, telling him takes a few attempts before Katniss wants to hurry up and spit it out. The thoughts spur around her head, almost making her sick.

"It hurts, Peeta. " She pauses, waiting for Peeta's reaction. He seems rather confused, rather like she means physically rather than mentally. "Seeing all those people in there, living normal lives without any lives. I don't think I can do it. I've been through so much, and all it takes is for one damn baby to kill that strength I built up. I fucking hate it, Peeta. I really do." Peeta looks shocked, but also slightly relieved. He must have been thinking it was physical pains. Still, Katniss has only sworn a few times he has been with her, so this is a shock. His shock and upset shows in the next few words he says.

"You hate the child, or what it's doing to you?" He asks, staring deep at her with his deep blue eyes. Katniss looks away. She can't look at him and lie. She just can't do it. Her mind spurs back to so many years ago, when she was telling Peeta that it was all fake, everything she had done in the arena with him had been faked. A tear trickled down her cheek, but she was quick to wipe it away before Peeta saw it.

"No matter what happens to me, if this baby comes out alive or not, you are going to love it. Real or not real?" Katniss asks, a question that has been grating on her mind for so long. A question that will decide so much. Peeta can't blame this child if she dies, Katniss won't let him. But in a moment, everything is still when he looks at her, deep into her grey eyes, and says. "Not real."


	7. Three hearts, beating together

Katniss cradles her baby, holding it in her arms. Tears start to form in Katniss' eyelids, until she can't contain herself. She bursts into tears, holding her child so tightly to her chest the nurse warns her that she may kill it. But within a second, her beautiful child is taken away. Taken away to an incubator, and she can no longer hear the blissful sound of her child crying. She sinks onto the floor, almost drowning into her pool of tears. The nurses come back, and tell her their condolences, and that her baby is dead. Her beautiful child that she only held for one minute. It doesn't seem real. It can't be real. And then Katniss wakes up, screaming for Peeta. Then she remembers she chucked him downstairs, and she has to comfort herself from this nightmare.

But she can't get back to sleep. No matter how many times she rolls over in all types of positions, no matter how many times she opens and shuts her eyes, it won't work. She hears the nurse's words in her eye, almost like a headache. But so much more painful. Katniss won't admit it, but she needs Peeta. She needs his arms wrapped around her waist, telling her everything's going to be okay. But her pride gets in the way, telling her if she cares for this baby she has to wait until Peeta accepts it. _I cannot die, and have this child without a home or a loving father. He needs to do this for our baby, not me._ She closed her eyes, hoping sleep would overcome her. It didn't. She checked her clock. 4:35 AM. Katniss rolled over and tilted her head back, her heat beating so fast she could almost hear it.

"Can I come in?" Katniss heard Peeta's voice, much more like a little boy rather than a father. She rolled onto the other side, holding the sheet tightly, even though she was boiling hot. Katniss heard a knock at the door, and rolled her eyes. She wouldn't speak to him. Not until he said he was sorry, that he never meant it. That he would love this child no matter what. That he would love _his_ child. If she heard that, then she would forgive him. Unless he didn't mean it. Katniss has always been able to tell if Peeta is lying. She hears a creek as the door opens, and Peeta enters with freshly baked muffins. Katniss forces herself not to smile. Her favourite.

"I'm sorry, Katniss. I didn't mean it. It's just seeing you run out because of it made me hate it, but I don't want to. I want to be it's father." Katniss looks up at Peeta, her eyes bigger than she realized she could get them, rather like a little puppy. Peeta, once again, found himself lost in her beauty. He remembered the first time he had seen that beautiful face, back in district twelve when he had given her the burnt bread. His mother had never found out, but he had gotten himself hit for her. Seeing the desperation in her face, seeing how she was almost starved to death. He shook himself out of it, returning to Katniss.

"I know you're not lying. But I can't deal with this anymore Peeta. If you're with me and this baby now, you have to be with us both forever. No matter what. Can you do that?" Katniss held her stomach, feeling the baby kick. It occurred to her she didn't have a name for her child. She asked Peeta to feel her stomach, as there were two hearts beating inside her. Two hearts that loved Peeta. He smiled, and felt the baby kick. Then, Peeta nodded his head. It meant _I'll stick by you both. _And Katniss knew that he meant it. She didn't need to hear him say it.

"I'm going to love this baby, I swear." He says, and Katniss thinks back to their wedding day. When he promised to love and stick by her no matter what. They had their own vows, as the victors of district 12 couldn't have normal, boring vows. Back when they were just victims of the Capitol. Back when Katniss thought she didn't love Peeta. When, inside, she wanted him so bad. Katniss always looked back at that, wondering why she never admitted her feelings. Truth be told, she never admitted her feelings. Feelings made bad things happen. Feelings ruined you. Everything would be so easy if she didn't care for this child, if she could kill it without feeling a thing. But she couldn't. No matter what, she loved her child.

"I'm not going to give up, Peeta. I can't lost hope." And then she realizes she's crying. Katniss Everdeen, who doesn't cry over anything has cried more than twice just this past month. Katniss wants to snap herself out of it, to become stronger. But she can't. She feels Peeta's arms wrap around her, those strong arms she has been wanting all day long. She bends back her head so it's on his chest, tears continuing to pour down her face. She can hear the beat of his heart. He's shushing her, almost like a baby. And Katniss looks up to see he's crying too. Not as much as her, but nonetheless he is crying.

"I know how much this means to you. Please don't cry baby." Peeta sobs, cradling Katniss closer to his chest. It is one of the very few times he has called Katniss baby, and whenever he calls her it, it means that he's scared and worried but he will stick by her. It's so odd how one word can mean so much. She holds his hand, deciding to once again be the strong one.

"We will get through this, I promise." Katniss says, smiling at Peeta, the tears disappearing from her face. Peeta nods, his tears coming thick and at a much more rapid pace. _Oh, Peeta. You big softie._ Katniss thinks, as she laughs at him. He's always been very feminine, and always cries more than Katniss. She holds tighter onto his hand, forcing it onto her stomach. They lay back on the bed, falling asleep with Peeta's hand still on Katniss' stomach.


	8. Can't turn back now, I'm haunted

_Authors Note: This one's the longest yet! It contains the lyrics of Taylor Swift's haunted. I'm not really sure why, I thought it worked well with it. Please review and thanks for reviewing, adding to favourites and adding to alerts! _

_You and I walk a fragile line, I have known it all this time_

Katniss found herself in the h's waiting room, once again. Thankfully, they had stopped trying to convince her to get rid of the child. But Katniss suspected that if it was still possible, they would. Peeta had become very distant over the past few weeks, even though he had promised to stick by her child. Katniss, in her heart, knew that he would still stick by them both, but in her head it wasn't quite so clear. She just wanted Peeta to hold her again, to tell her that everything would be alright. But he hadn't held her for so long, Katniss had almost forgotten what it felt like. Her thoughts were disrupted by a creak in the door, and the doctor appearing.

"Mr and Mrs Mellark?" Katniss tried to hold Peeta's hand, but he somehow escaped her clutch. Katniss wanted to scream, to hate him for it. But in all honesty, she couldn't blame him. She knew he would try to love this child, but they had promised to protect each other. And that promise meant more to him then his promise for his own child. They sat in the doctor's surgery, preparing for another scan. Peeta daren't look at her, his eyes darting to the floor. Katniss holds out her hand to him once again, but yet he still doesn't reply. She fights back tears, returning back to the scan. But she can't help stealing glances at Peeta, and how he still has no emotion for this child.

"Your chances of survival seem to have lowered." The midwife says, also seeming to have no emotion. Peeta walks out without a word, leaving a tenseness in the air. Katniss tries to scream for him to come back, but it won't escape her throat. Not even then do the tears come. It seems she has cried so much the past few months, that her emotions want to kill her even more, by not being able to let them out. Katniss wants to ask so many questions. Before, her chances were 50/50. What are they now? _I am going to die_, she thinks, _this is my death. _In all honesty, Katniss sees it as a fitting way to die. For her child. But she would have lost Peeta whilst doing it.

_I have known it all this time__,__but I never thought I'd live to see it break_

Katniss rushed out of the surgery as soon as she was told she could leave, hoping to find Peeta. Her heart beat fast, thinking that he'd run away. If he had, then Katniss knew she wouldn't be able to cope. She would just have to survive until this baby lived, and then she would die. _But I want to die with Peeta, _she sobbed to herself. Peeta, the love of her life. Peeta, who had always been there to comfort her from her nightmares. He was all she wanted, and vice versa. Why had their own child come between them?

"Surprised you didn't stay in there longer." Katniss turned around, and saw Peeta. He looked as if he had been crying. Katniss reached out to hug him, but he pushed her away. It hurt Katniss more than she could explain. But yet the tears still didn't come, no matter how much it hurt. Katniss knew there was only one way to get rid of this anger, even though she knew she would regret it. Katniss slapped him round the face, a rather hard hit. Peeta's cheeks turned red, and in an instant she regretted it. Katniss couldn't even look at Peeta. She turned around, and left.

_It's getting dark and it's all too quiet__, __and I can't trust anything now_

"You promised to stick by me! You promised to stick by our child." Katniss now was crying, and the tears were coming like a waterfall. Not long ago, her and Peeta were splashing around in the water, excited for this child. It had been so long since they had made love. Peeta hadn't spoken since they had returned, although he had followed her home. He seemed to still care for her, no matter what. That one thought kept Katniss strong. Reminded her that Peeta was still in love with her. Katniss hated it that she needed reminding, that Peeta didn't just tell her.

"I can't do this anymore! I can't pretend like I'm going to be okay when you leave. I can't pretend I'm okay with any of this." Peeta sobbed, tears streaming down his face. Katniss caressed his face, and this time he didn't pull away. Instead, he held her close. For the first time in what felt like so long. Whilst Peeta pulled away within a few seconds, his touch made her long for so much more. She wanted to hold him again, to tell him everything would be okay. But if she didn't believe it, then she couldn't lie to him. She had done it in the arena, when her and Haymitch were trying to keep Peeta alive. _I can't do that to him again, _she thought.

_And it's coming over you like it's all a big mistake_

"Do you regret it?" Katniss asked, a question that had popped into her mind. She had never really thought about it, if he regretted what they had done to make this child. He had always been the one begging for a child, for years and years. Katniss never wanted them if the games continued. To see her own children fighting for survival, she had never wanted that. At least the games were over now. But in Katniss' mind, they never were. They haunted her all the time.

"I don't think I'll ever regret it. I'm the one who wanted the child." Peeta almost wanted to lie, to say he regretted it so much. Regretted putting her life in danger. But he couldn't. He had wanted a baby for so long, and even though it may be selfish, this was his child. And Peeta loved it, even though he couldn't admit it to Katniss. It all felt like he was lying. All he had ever wanted was a life with Katniss, and a child. Or maybe more than one. But nothing was ever that simple, not for Peeta and Katniss.

"Then why do you hate our child? Why can't you understand I need you to be there for me?" Katniss didn't intend it to come out as a question. But Katniss had never been good at being angry at Peeta, no matter how hard she tried. Those blue eyes always made her melt at first sight, and they were her complete weakness, no matter how hard she tried to resist them, she couldn't. "I don't hate our child, Katniss. But I can't say goodbye to you." Peeta regretted the words as soon as they came out of his mouth, almost tasting like salt on his tongue.

_Oh, I'm holding my breath__, __won't lose you again_

"Maybe you won't lose me." Katniss says, moving her body closer to Peeta's. He doesn't try to break away from her hold. Doesn't try to push her away. Peeta opens his mouth to say something, but Katniss pushes her finger to his lips, not wanting words to ruin this moment. The most intimate moment they had shared in the past few weeks. Peeta didn't even move when Katniss pressed her stomach against his, the baby kicking inside her. Katniss knew Peeta wanted this as much as she did, so she teased him at first, licking his lips. He held on tight to her body, swaying back and forth. Katniss hated how it had to always happen like this, how as soon as they touched she forgot about the baby, how it was killing her inside. Katniss felt the tears drop down her face, and prayed Peeta didn't notice them. But, of course, he did. He stopped holding her. He stopped longing for her touch.

"I fucked it up again, didn't I? Why do I have to ruin everything?" Katniss cried, all her feelings rushing out into a few words. She hated how he made her feel like this. How with just looking at her, she admitted everything. Katniss was a fierce, hard, unlovable person. But Peeta changed all that. Made her love, made her softer. And sometimes, she hated him for it. The old Katniss wouldn't have cared, wouldn't have needed someone else's acceptance to carry on with her pregnancy. But over the years, Katniss had become wiser, and realized that she needed to realize they were other people in the world. That she needed to stop being selfish. The arena had changed her as a person in so many ways.

_Something's made your eyes go cold_

Peeta held Katniss' hand, returning to not speaking. Even without his words, Katniss could see the pain in his eyes. These few months could be their last moments together, and she was spending most of it crying. What happened to being strong? What happened to getting through it? But no matter how hard Katniss tried, she knew she could never be strong. Not when she was facing something like this. Katniss wiped her tears, and decided that if these were her last months with Peeta, she would make them worth something.

"Peeta, these could be our last months together. I don't want to spend them crying, or with you not talking to me." Katniss swore she saw a slight smile appear on Peeta's face, which she knew meant that whilst he hated it, he would try his best. Of course, Katniss didn't really like it either. It annoyed her how Peeta didn't seem to realize this was hard for both of them, not just him. He seemed to think she had already chosen to die. But if Katniss could live, she would. There's been times when she has felt as if dying would be the best option, especially in the hunger games. And when Prim died. Katniss had spent so long trying to keep her safe, but yet she died anyway. Katniss tried to stop herself from thinking about it, blocking it from her mind. But yet somehow it always wormed it's way back in.

"We'll do whatever you want." Peeta says, stroking Katniss' hair. If that moment had been frozen, it would have been perfect. A moment that could be kept, and locked away forever. A moment you could relive. But, moments like that don't happen often. So Katniss didn't move, stayed still, resting her head on Peeta's shoulder. She shushed Peeta when he started to talk, determined not to ruin the moment again. Peeta and Katniss simply stayed there, until night fell. And for once, Katniss felt as if everything might be okay. That she would get through this. But if she lost Peeta again, she wouldn't be able to cope.

_Come on, come on, don't leave me like this__, __I thought I had you figured out_

Katniss knew Peeta better than anyone else. Without him, her world was pointless. At least if she passed away, he would have her child. But if they both died together, Peeta wouldn't have anything to live for. And Peeta and her child were the only reasons she was fighting to stay alive. "What would you do? If we both died?" Katniss pointed to her stomach, signifying "both". Peeta simply put his lips to hers, answering it with a kiss. One more passionate than they had shared for so long. The kiss answered Katniss' question, but not with the answer she longed for.

_Something's gone terribly wrong__, __you're all I wanted_

All Katniss wanted is for Peeta to live on with his life, but it was never going to be that simple. Katniss knew he couldn't live without her. But would he really do it? _Suicide. _The word echoed around Katniss' head, almost making her feel like it was hollow. Suicide had never been attempted by a victor, so Katniss knew it would be all over the Capitol. When they didn't really care, which annoyed Katniss the most. _He can't do it, I won't let him, _Katniss thought. But then that awful, pessimistic voice crept into Katniss' head and said _you won't be there to stop him. _And as much as Katniss hated it, she knew it was true. She couldn't hate this baby, no matter what. But sometimes it was so hard.

_Come on, come on, don't leave me like this, I thought I had you figured out__._

_Can't breathe whenever you're gone__, __can't turn back now, I'm haunted._


	9. Family leaves

"Isn't this nice?" Katniss said, as her and Peeta walked through the woods. It was autumn, so they trod on leaves wherever they stepped. They were wrapped up in scarves and hats, even though Katniss had wanted them to go out in a little less. The cold had never really affected her, it was most likely as she used to hunt with simply just a jacket, and had gotten used to it. But Peeta, often used to the heat of the bakery, preferred being warm. It was one of their little differences. Katniss stopped for a minute, thinking of what romantic things she could do for Peeta. So, she gathered up the leaves, whilst Peeta looked at her strangely.

"Should I ask what you're doing, or just leave you to it?" Peeta asked, sitting on the park bench looking at Katniss. She was slightly crouched over, and Peeta couldn't stop himself from looking. Katniss noticed, and smiled. Peeta had never been much of a flirt, hence why it took him years to tell her how he felt, but sometimes he could be. Katniss had often laughed at the stupidity of his pick up lines, although she secretly loved them. Before Katniss, Peeta had been rather scared of the world. Thanks to Katniss, he was now fearless. Katniss added one last leave to her art, and stood up, prodding Peeta.

"Like it?" Katniss had used the leaves to create a heart with K+P in it. It was so cliché, and so unlike her, she knew it would make Peeta laugh. But, instead of laughing, he grabbed a few extra leaves and added more to the leave work. "Hey, don't mess with my art!" Katniss said, rather sarcastically. Peeta smiled at her, and Katniss found herself in the same position Peeta had been. She just couldn't resist looking. It didn't take Peeta long, and he stood up, revealing his work. He had added a +B to it. Katniss frowned at him, confused. "What does +B mean?" She asked.

"Plus baby." Peeta said, kissing Katniss' forehead. Katniss grinned. She was glad Peeta had gotten used to the idea of maybe losing her. She knew it would be hard for him, but that was completely normal. Everybody suffered when they lost someone they loved. Katniss and Peeta carried on walking, hand in hand. Katniss pointed out a mockingjay, an animal that had once meant rebellion in her eyes. She still had the brooch, locked away in her jewellery box. Katniss sung a short tune to the mockingjays, then waited for them to repeat it. They picked up the song, and after a few minutes, most of the birds of the park were starting to sing it. She noticed Peeta looking at her in wonder.

"You know, you're just like your father. When you sing, even the birds stop to listen." Peeta said, in awe of Katniss. He had always wondered how she had become his. How, when she could have had anyway, she had chosen him. Katniss blushed, a sight so girly Peeta didn't often see it on Katniss. She nudged him to carry on walking, so they did until they reached the end of the woods.

"Where now?" Peeta asked. Katniss laughed, and ran through the trees. Peeta shook his head, then followed after her. He found her in a field, running around. Peeta laughed. It was rather like they were young again, when he had watched Katniss every day, in hope of one day talking to her. When he had told Katniss, she had claimed he was a "stalker". She meant it in a jokey way, but it was sort of true. Peeta used to be young and silly. How he had thought watching Katniss undress was completely normal. It had been rather awkward when she undressed in front of him, as she had said she was nervous as she thought it was the first time he had seen her body in its whole glory, so when Peeta explained it wasn't she hit him. It was supposed to be a playful hit, but it made Peeta's nose bleed. He had gotten a bit stronger since then.

"Hey, stalker." Katniss shouted, walking over to Peeta. Peeta laughed, holding out his hand for her to hold. She smiled, and took it. They laid down in the daisies, their hands still entwined. Katniss let go, and started to roll around in the daisies in manic laughter. _If these are my last few weeks, I'm going to enjoy them_, she thought. She looked over to Peeta, who seemed to have fallen asleep. She grinned to herself and took some lipstick out of her purse. She didn't use make up that much, only when she had to but the lipstick had been in her bag for a while. She couldn't remember why she had put it in there. Katniss first started with Peeta's lips, then drew a moustache with the lipstick. She laughed to herself, shaking Peeta to try and wake him up. She stood up over him, her shadow overcasting him.

"What? Did I fall asleep?" Peeta said, rather embarrassed. Katniss smiled, kicking his feet. Suddenly, she felt a kick from the baby. It was the heaviest kick she had felt for a while. She decided to forget about it, and grabbed Peeta's hand to pull him up. They ran around in the field for a while, until they were out of breath. Katniss was about to suggest going back, when Peeta pointed downwards. "Katniss…" He said, and Katniss looked down to see that her waters had broken. She sighed. It couldn't have happened while she was at home, could it?


	10. Frustration beyond words

**A/N: I know this chapter is rather short, but I'm just preparing for the next chapter which will be the longest chapter yet. It may take a while to write as I'm now back at school, but I promise it will be up soon as! For now, enjoy this chapter :)**

"It's OK baby girl, you can do this." Peeta exclaimed, holding tight onto Katniss' hand. She hadn't let it go through every single labour pain, and it was starting to go red raw. Peeta daren't complain, as he was still terrified of losing her.

"I'm not even going to discuss the fact you just called me baby girl." Katniss said, and Peeta laughed. She always had that sarcastic, funny way about her. She started to grab the sides of the bed, and Peeta grunted. Another labour pain, which meant his hand would be squeezed the hell out of. Peeta felt as if he had been standing there for hours, and thought to himself _when will this end? _Truth be told, he almost didn't want it to end because by then he could've lost Katniss, or his child, or both. He couldn't bare it if it was both.

"Peeta! Snap out of it and focus!" Katniss shouted from the bed, her brunette hair falling over the pillow. Peeta loved it when she had her hair down, as she always insisted on having it tied up. He felt a sharp pain go through his arm, which shook him back to reality. A long, thin, red line now appeared on his arm. Katniss grinned sheepishly, almost apologetic. "Don't worry." He said, smiling. He knew this was a pride thing- it was to stop her from screaming. The midwife walked up to Katniss, and Peeta hoped it wouldn't be bad.

"We'll need to perform a C-section, because it's impossible to get the child out of your womb without killing you in the process. Even with a C-section results cannot be promised." The midwife didn't even seem apologetic, which irked Peeta. He didn't want an emotionless, draining woman delivering his child. Katniss just nodded, tired from the labour pains. Peeta looked at the midwife, refusing to smile at her. "So will that be now?" He asked, becoming impatient. The nurse shook her head, and tapped her watch.

"In about an hour." She replied. Peeta was ready to scream at this woman, to tell her that his wife may die and that she needed to get this baby out of her quick, but Katniss stopped him. Anger boiled up inside him, but yet Katniss would not yet him release it. Did she have a death wish or something?

"Get this baby out of me now." Katniss demanded, venom in her tone. The midwife didn't show any emotion, just simply shook her head and dismissed the idea. But Katniss wasn't one to give up that easy, even with labour pains shooting through her every three minutes. "You either perform the C-section now, or I leave and do this at home. And die." She emphasized the last word, and the say she said it sent chills down Peeta's spine. She couldn't die. She wouldn't die. And Peeta would in no way let her do this at home, no matter what. The anger levels in his body had risen again, and he found he needed some way to get them out. And that stupid nurses face just kept looking at him, without any emotion at the fact his wife and child could die today. He stepped forward, and slapped the midwife around the face.


	11. You'll always have my heart

**A/N: Heya guys! Thanks for all the reviews and stuff. I hope you like this chapter, I really do. It may be the last chapter, but that's your choice, read the end authors note!**

"Don't leave me Peeta!" Katniss screamed, reaching out for Peeta on what could turn out to be her death bed. Peeta just shook his head, being lead out by the nurses. The midwifes cheek had turned bright red, and Peeta had had to be kicked out.

"Please, listen to me. I could die. Let my husband be with me during what could be my last few hours." Katniss pleaded to the midwife, who replied with a cold, glassy look in her eyes. She could see why Peeta hit her. The fact she showed no compassion or understanding for them annoyed her also. "Let him stay!" She pleaded once again, this time to the nurses. They looked at each other, then released their tight grip on Peeta's shirt. Katniss hadn't noticed that. It made her even more angry.

"You can stay, but you cause any more trouble and that's it. By the way, good luck with the delivery of your child." One of the nurses smiled, and Katniss wished that she could be her midwife, rather than this emotionless lump. She sighed. She would have to learn to deal with it. Peeta thanked the nurses, and stepped inside the room. The midwife stared at him coldly, reaching her hand up to her cheek almost as an instinct. Katniss felt an immense pain go through her, and held her hand to her stomach. "Peeta!" She shouted, and Peeta walked over and held her hand.

The pains were coming thick and fast now, and Katniss screamed a few times, but most of the time she squeezed the life out of Peeta's hand. The midwife came over, and directed her on her breathing. "I know how to breath you bitch!" Katniss screamed through the contraptions. It felt good to insult her, when she had an excuse. The midwife was just about to call the nurses to start the C-section, when she noticed a small tuft of hair popping out.

"It looks like we're going to do this the old fashioned way." The midwife said, with a little more emotion. Katniss screamed. _Shit, I'm going to die. I'm actually going to die, _was all she could think of. She could hear Peeta screaming, telling the midwife he told her she should have started the C-section earlier. But it only felt like background noise to Katniss. She couldn't even hardly the feel the contraptions. She knew she was slipping from life. _No, I can't. If I die, at least let my baby live, _she pleaded in her head.

"Get this baby out of me now!" She screamed at the midwife, tears rolling down her face. Peeta locked his eyes on hers, and for a moment, it was perfect. Then she was snapped back to life and she heard the midwife shouting in her ear to push. It wasn't fair, Katniss hadn't even had that long a pregnancy. Peeta held her hands, his cheeks wet from tears. "Baby, please don't die on me." He pleaded, and Katniss couldn't moan at him for calling her baby this time, considering she was going to die. She carried on pushing, even though she couldn't see through her tears. She couldn't speak, words failed her. All she could think was _I'm going to die, but this baby's going to live. _

"The head's fully out." The midwife said, and Katniss kept on pushing. Peeta couldn't say anything either, all he could imagine was that he was going to lose her. The love of his life, the girl he had fallen in love with the day he met her. The girl who had survived through so much, and came out so much stronger. _Katniss Everdeen, the girl on fire. _The girl who had told him it was all for the games, even though she was falling for him more every single day. He was brought back to life by a cry, and he almost cried. But then he remembered Katniss.

"Katniss, are you OK?" He asked, without any emotion because he was numb. The tears wouldn't come anymore, or so he thought. "Peeta, I'm so sorry. I don't want to leave you. Please promise me you'll take care of Prim-Rue." She said, as a demand. Peeta nodded his head, his mouth becoming dry. _Prim-Rue_. His darling daughter, who's mother had sacrificed her life for her. Peeta kissed Katniss' head, but then moved down to her lips. She used her last breath to mutter three last words.

"I love you." She said, and within an instant, she was gone.

"I love you, too." Peeta said, the tears coming back. He wanted to scream, to hate the world, to die and never come back. He wanted to replay every single memory he'd ever had with Katniss, he would even go back to the games if he could. He gave Katniss' cold, dead lips one last kiss and pulled away, meet by a crying child who was placed in his arms.

"Can you take her? I need a moment with my wife." He asked the midwife, who obliged and took the baby back. When he heard the door slam shut, he turned to Katniss, his eyes red. He couldn't feel anything besides pain, and it didn't even feel real. He imagined Katniss walking through the door, holding her baby and then they could be one happy family. But fairytales never happened for Peeta, he should've realised that by now. He turned to his wife, hating to see her that emotionless.

"I'm going to take care of her, I promise. I'm going to give you such an amazing funeral, and Prim-Rue is going to have the best dad ever. I'll tell her stories of you every single day, to make sure she never forgets you. She'll know you, in her heart because I'll fill her with so many memories. I promise I'll never love anyone else, I promise that I'll visit your grave at least once a week and place fresh flowers. Though not roses, because I know they still traumatize you. I'll keep your memory alive, girl on fire. Nobody will ever forget you, I'll make sure of that. I love you with every beat of my heart, with every breath I take. It's corny, but I promise that will never change. I'm making so many promises but I will keep them. I'll keep them all for you. I love you so much."

Peeta picked up her hand and kissed it, wishing he could feel close to her one more time. Wishing he could feel her body against his one more time. Katniss lived on through Prim-Rue, and that was what kept Peeta from wanting to join her. He was a father. He kissed Katniss one more time on the lips, even though it didn't feel right. The lips were turning blue and they were ever so cold. All life had been drained out of Katniss within minutes, and that broke Peeta. He looked up at the ceiling, hoping the whole Heaven thing was true. He pressed his three left middle fingers to his lips, and held them out to Katniss. He then walked out of the door, ready to meet his child. But his presence stayed in the room, along with Katniss'.

**I'm sorry if this crushed you, it crushed me to write it. I feel so bad for killing her off, but think about it, Katniss is still a survivor, so that's why I did it. Should I do some more chapters of Peeta with Prim-Rue, raising her alone? Tell me what you think.**


	12. Epilogue

**A/N: Here it is, the last chapter! I really hope you have enjoyed this story, and thankyou for the reviews and such, it means a lot. I love you all!**

"It's OK, shush." Peeta hushed the crying child in his arms, wishing Katniss could be there. It had taken him a while but, eventually, he had grown to love Prim-Rue. When he saw her in the hospital, he was filled with hatred. Why did they have to take Katniss? Whoever "they" was, of course. But this child was Katniss living on, and he had promised her to take care of Prim-Rue no matter what. He was a father, he couldn't just abandon his child. The little bundle stopped crying and smiled at Peeta. The gesture filled Peeta with tears. It was the first time she had smiled and even her smile reminded Peeta of Katniss. Everything in Prim-Rue resembled her. The grey eyes, the brown hair, just everything. When her hair was long enough he'd have to tie her hair in a braid much like her mother's, but slightly different. The baby's eyelids fluttered and it fell asleep in Peeta's arms.

As Peeta carried the child up to it's room, he thought of another story to tell her of her mother. He did it all the time, it helped him cope. And sometimes he swore he could see Prim-Rue awakening, aware her mother was in presence. He decided to tell the story of the first day he saw her. Infact, this was before the burnt bread incident. He'd noticed her for so long, praying she'd notice him back.

"When I first saw your mother I was only young. About ten, I'd say. I felt something I'd never felt for her and I knew, in that moment, that we were meant to be. You may think that that's weird to say from the first sight of her, but I knew it. Her beauty astounded me. Even though she had the classic seam look, there was also something unique about her. She was a fighter, I could tell. From then on all I wanted was her, nobody else. I got with this one girl, mother set her up with me. I didn't really like her, and she kept moaning at me because all I could do was look at Katniss. I got her in the end, though. I kind of made that my life goal, to get the girl. Well, to get Katniss. Your mother was never an ordinary girl." Peeta laughed, then paused for a moment. Prim-Rue was now fully asleep, and he daren't wake her. He gave her a kiss on the forehead, and carefully shut the door.

"Night, Prim-Rue." He whispered, and saw Prim-Rue kick her feet slightly. Months ago, he thought that if this child killed Katniss he could never love her. But when he saw her face, he couldn't help but love her. And it was Katniss' last wish, and whilst it would be funny, he'd hate to think of her frowning at him from Heaven. Oh god, that was a funny image. Peeta knew it would be hard raising Prim-Rue alone, but Johanna had promised to help so it could be a lot easier. Even though the idea of being alone with her scared him, he knew he'd be begging for her help soon enough. No matter what, he wouldn't trade his child for anything. Katniss had cheated death so many times and whilst he wished their child could see her mother, he knew that it had been her time. It kept him sane.


	13. Very very very late authors note

AUTHORS NOTE:

Okay, so I know this makes no logical sense as I uploaded this story like a year ago but I feel like John Green (but obviously not as good a write) and I didn't mean to make you all cry okay I'm sorry I didn't think the story was good enough to. One review made me feel so bad and I'm sorry if you all hate me okay but I knew from the start I was going to kill off Katniss. I've never liked happy endings, I guess I'm morbid like that. And yeah, the story is a little like twilight I'm sorry about that I didn't even realise, I just had the idea and never realised that's where I got it from. Don't hate me because I don't like people being mad at me it was a giant plot twist I know but I think it was better that way. Again, sorry for making any of you cry, and I should've added this note like six months ago but! Love, Georgina


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